


This Distance

by B2Min



Category: NU'EST, Wanna One (Band)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-28
Updated: 2017-11-02
Packaged: 2019-01-25 14:34:43
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12533836
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/B2Min/pseuds/B2Min
Summary: “You’re an idiot. But I’d rather you be my idiot. I'm already yours."





	1. We'll be Superglue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Where Minhyun makes the most of whatever time they have left

It was past 4am by the time the Nu'est members reached their dorms. Too much to think about - a future that was scarily uncertain, yet exciting. Minhyun would be (temporarily) in another band while Nu'est would continue doing what it had been doing the last few years - surviving.

At least this time, that ember of hope they’d held on to all those years, which had seemed so close to dying, was burning so bright. As bright as the eyes of fans holding aloft posters, screaming their names.

There was a lot to think about and plan, but Baekho decided that could wait until they got some sleep. He was just happy enough to be able to sleep in his own bed, with no cameras hidden in corners.

Minhyun had other ideas apparently, as he was standing in the doorway of Baekho’s room.

"Hey."

Baekho grunted in response, too tired to ask Minhyun what he wanted. It was past five in the morning after all.

“I just..” Minhyun paused, before picking Baekho’s Produce 101 jacket off the floor. “Guess I better wash this. It’s got my snot on it, after all.”

Baekho grunted again. “Go to sleep Minhyun-ah. The jacket can wait.”

“OK.” Minhyun walked to the door but stopped, instead moving to sit on the bed next to Baekho.

“Can I…can I sleep here instead? I just don’t…” Minhyun didn’t manage to finish his sentence before he found himself pulled under the covers, strong arms holding him close.

“Fine. Whatever. Just shut up and sleep,” Baekho mumbled into Minhyun’s hair.

The last thought Minhyun had before drifting off was that he’d probably have to wash Baekho’s drool out of his hair later. But he could live with that.

***

They'd decided the next morning they would take a road trip; just the five of them. No manager, no staff, no one else. 

"You can't bring Bumzu, Baekho," JR said, sternly.

Baekho, testily replied, "I wasn't even going to suggest it."

Ren gave Baekho a sidelong glance, "Really? He is your favourite hyung after all."

"We'll hang out when we all come back. Anyway I already have ideas for music that I'm going to bounce off him. This trip, it'll just be us. I want it that way too."

"I won't let you feel lonely, Baekho!" Minhyun playfully wrapped an arm around the other man's shoulder. 

Baekho snorted. "Says the man who never picked me for any of his groups."

Minhyun was gobsmacked. "What, you, I..." Baekho waved his arm at him in a dismissive gesture, "I'm just kidding."

Of course the only time Minhyun had any real choice in who his Produce 101 performance team was, was when he formed his so-called Justice League.

Still he knew that though Baekho understood that it made sense they were never in the same performance groups, Minhyun had still performed with JR twice but not once with either Ren or Baekho. 

It worked out for the both of them; separately they shone in their own teams without the burden of fearing one would outshine the other.

Baekho had told Minhyun once,"You know what you are that I'm not? You're like this source of light that everyone is drawn to. But where there's light, there has to be a shadow. That's what I am."

Granted that had been 2am in the morning and a rather pissy Baekho had just come back from a date with a girl who'd really only wanted Minhyun's number.

Then JR'S throat-clearing broke the awkward silence. "Let's start planning shall we? The car's sorted so all we need to do is pack and I'll let the CEO know."

"You sure he'll let us go off like this?" Aron asked.

"It's the least he can do. After everything." Ren said, quietly. 

"OK everyone, let's start packing. And Baekho don't forget to pack your toothbrush and underwear this time. We can't just keep buying the shit you forget." JR was in full-on bossy mode - he was sweet and patient on TV but with Nu'est he knew he could be firmer and more direct.

Baekho was already grumbling as he set off to pack but was surprised to see Minhyun tagging along with him.

"Eh don't you have your own packing to do?"

Minhyun shrugged. "I packed after I got out of the shower just now. You need the extra help."

"I can pack just fine." Minhyun laughed, "JR reminded you for a reason, man. Or do I have to bring up the commando incident? There's traumatising footage I'm sure your fangirls would love to see and Kuanlin would love to forget."

"I hate you." Minhyun's sing-song reply: "No, you don't."

The next hour saw Baekho chuck things in his bag with Minhyun's idea of helping being commentary and the occasional re-folding of clothes.

"Also," Minhyun said, "You're rooming with me, I don't care."

"You missed me that much?" Baekho asked.

"No, you will. When I'm gone. I'm just thinking of your wellbeing."

"Smartass." 

It wasn't long before they had gotten into a minivan loaned by another of Baekho's hyungs and were off on a camera-free, non-TV broadcast adventure.

There was bickering, terrible-on-purpose singing, Aron insisting they stop for pork skin and Baekho not letting Minhyun live it down for forgetting to pack socks (it was OK Baekho had spares). And Baekho having to be the little spoon at night as Minhyun insisted, pulling the "I'm going to be away for a long time just give me this one (of many) things."

It was the best of times. They would need it then, when one of the worst of times came soon after.


	2. Big Stupid

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "This isn't easy for me."
> 
> "When are good things easy, stupid? You should know that by now."

No matter what people tell you about grief, you never really understand it until you experience it. For Baekho it was this gnawing hollowness that was left after all the tears, the rage, the frustration, the shock had passed through like waves, crashing one after another.

When the news of his father's death had come, the members, his hyungs had all been there with him. It'd been a rough enough month what with dealing with the drama after Produce (his agency had firmly told him they would deal with that) and now this? All he wanted to do was hide in his room, hoping maybe once he'd woken up all of this would be a bad dream.

It wasn't Bumzu he'd leaned on the most through everything. Of all people, Minhyun had refused to leave his side.

A Minhyun who was now here, with him at Jeju after the funeral, instead of preparing for Wanna One's debut.

They'd gone to a cafe, just the two of them, for a little breathing space. He felt bad about leaving his mother at home but his brother was with her, and it was just so hard being at home with all the memories.

"You should go back soon, you know," he said.  
  
"Mmm." Minhyun merely hummed in response.  
  
"Minhyun-ah, what are you doing," he looked up at where Minhyun was standing, apparently after taking a picture.

"I...just wanted something to remember you by." Minhyun showed the picture he just took, of Baekho slumped in a chair looking at his phone.

"Send that to me, will you?"  
  
"Yeah, OK."

They both knew Minhyun would need to leave soon what with the upcoming Wanna One promotions. And he wouldn't be hearing from Minhyun for awhile as apparently they wouldn't have access to their phones for a bit.

"I was going to tell you...I'm leaving tomorrow morning."  
  
Baekho nodded. Minhyun managing to stay as long as he did was achieved through sheer stubbornness. He'd told YMC that to him Baekho was family and deaths in the family was good enough reason for a small delay.

"I'll still be here tonight. We'll be roomies, for just one more night until..."  
  
"Yeah and I'll have some peace and quiet without you bothering me all the time."

Minhyun just stuck his tongue out at him. "You know you'll miss me."

Baekho snorted. And said nothing else as they quietly chilled in the cafe, before taking a short walk to a nice spot overlooking a nearby beach.

It was a beach Baekho had visited often with his father. Without warning, the emotions he thought he'd given vent to earlier in the day swelled up again. But he had no words. He had no tears left. All he could make was a choking sound as the feelings didn't care that he couldn't cry anymore, that he had nothing left to pour out.

Then he felt arms around his waist, Minhyun pulling him close in a tight backhug. Then a hand stroking his hair, Minhyun quietly whispering in his ear _I'm here its OK it will be OK_

They stood there, just the two of them, with nothing but the sound of the wind and waves, the cries of calling birds. It was a while before Baekho could finally find some strength to speak and he said:

"Why do you always know what to do? How do you always know what to say? You know what I need, what I want even when I don't. How?"

Minhyun said, lightly," Maybe you're just stupid."  
  
Baekho laughed right out loud then. He laughed hard, so hard that Minhyun was laughing along with him too but still holding onto him.

"Well if I'm stupid, that makes you stupider for still sticking around with me."  
  
"If Aron was here he'd call us Dumb and Dumber."

"Let's go home, Minhyun-ah." Minhyun nodded. And they walked arm-in-arm, all the way back.

****

Minhyun's flight back would only be around noon the next day but turning in early seemed a good idea. But this time, when they got in bed, Minhyun had pushed on Baekho's shoulder until the other man turned to face him.

"You want to be the little spoon this time, Minhyun-ah?" Baekho asked, sleepily.

Wordlessly, Minhyun reached over and instead pulled Baekho close, letting the other man's head rest slightly on his own chest.

He dipped his head low, whispering into Baekho's ear: "Just shut up and sleep."  
  
Then softly, he brushed his lips along the skin along Baekho's temple before finally letting them stop on his forehead, kissing it.

"You're so stupid sometimes," he whispered, as they both drifted quickly into sleep.

***

The next day was a rushed departure to the airport as the two had overslept (Minhyun blamed Baekho) with Minhyun making it just in the nick of time. There was no time for talking or awkward goodbyes. Just a quick hug before Minhyun had to rush to his gate after check-in...but then he'd rushed right back to Baekho.

"You forgot something?" Baekho asked, puzzled. Minhyun just shook his head, hugged him again before pecking him lightly on the side of his mouth and then turned, rushed away without looking back.

Baekho just stood, stunned. What exactly happened? Minhyun came back just to, well, kiss him? Sure it hadn't been on the lips but then he remembered that Minhyun was the resident skinship monster. There was that one time he decided to harass Ren by following him around the house and kissing him on the cheek every 10 seconds...until Ren threatened to stab him with a hair pin.

Maybe he just needed to have his fill of touching before he would be stuck rooming with boys who might not be as used to his octopus hands.

Maybe, Baekho thought, Minhyun was right. He was stupid.  
  
***

The next few weeks were a crazy mess - while Minhyun was busy doing his reality show and being cooped up in a strange dorm, Nu'est was now busy planning a comeback without him.

Aron joked about how Minhyun's big head would become even bigger now their concept was essentially all about missing/waiting for him.

"Nu'est W: Where the hell is Minhyun? Can we make that our album tagline?" "No, hyung."

They hadn't expected "If You" to be the hit it became and to see "Hello" become popular again, years after it came out? It was all a surreal dream.

Baekho found himself spending a lot of time holed up writing music with Bumzu, trying not to think too hard about what had happened with Minhyun. There was no one to talk to about it besides, well, Minhyun. It felt far too intimate to talk about with the others.

Minhyun had gotten his phone back but they hadn't chatted much about things besides the usual - Minhyun complaining about Jaehwan being a slob, about Jihoon always trying to sneak into his bed, Daniel snoring and Seongwoo being allergic to his skinship.

They'd tried to find time to meet up but there was always something - Minhyun shooting MVs, touring or Nu'est doing interviews or photo shoots that always seemed to happen around the same time.

Now there was the comeback album to sort out and, well, it felt as though if he didn't get to see Minhyun now they wouldn't see each other until next year.

"Hey." He'd texted Minhyun. "You free to come over to the studio and be around for the recording I'm doing for my solo? You haven't heard it yet, right."

"Yeah, you didn't send me the guide track for that one. You could still do that, you know."

Baekho sighed. "You said you might have some time the next two days. Which is around when I want to record the track so you know, kill two birds with one stone?"

Minhyun only answered maybe an hour later. "OK. Just say when."

They'd met up the next night with them being extra careful not to let anyone photograph Minhyun coming to the Pledis offices. Best not to stir up the noisy Wanna One akgaes.

"So we gonna listen to the track first before you do it?" Minhyun asked.  
  
Baekho shook his head. "Nah, I thought, you could just sit with Bumzu and listen to it the first time as I sing it. You know, like hearing it the first time live."  
  
Minhyun shrugged. "Well, OK then. I guess you must have practised it beforehand."

Baekho nodded. "I want to see if I can get it in less than three takes. The vocal trainer I've been seeing is pretty good, my throat doesn't bother me as much as it used to."  
  
"That's good. Well, then. Let me hear it."  
  
What Baekho wouldn't say to Minhyun was that he wanted him there for, well, artistic purposes. While the song was about his dad, his trainer had also said he needed to work on singing as though he was singing to one specific person.

"Keep your eyes open, Baekho. Closing your eyes might help you feel it but keeping them open, connecting to the people you're singing to, that is what makes a performance."

And of all people, he decided it made sense for him to sing the song to Minhyun.

It was a little tricky at first; he was used to practising the song with his eyes closed, by himself. But now he just focused on singing to Minhyun and not looking so much at the mic. As his trainer said, he already knew where the mic was, he didn't need to worry about placement etc as he would instinctively know what to do by now.

As he sang, he felt a curious lightness, as though the words flowed so much easier now they were focused. It was almost effortless - less of a performance as opposed to an intimate conversation-like atmosphere as though he was talking, not just singing to Minhyun.

Minhyun, he could see, was slowly swaying to the melody with Bumzu having his usual serious workface on. And as he sang the last two lines - _because I was by your side, I've been happy till now_ \- he saw Minhyun mouthing the words. That was a good thing, right?  
  
"So how was it?" Baekho was talking to Bumzu, but a smiling Minhyun gave him a thumbs up. Bumzu shook his head, "You know, I usually like making people record an extra take as a backup but for some reason I don't want to. But yeah, let's just do one more just in case."  
  
"One take Baekho! Whoo!" Minhyun was being his usual noisy self. And during the second take, Minhyun was a bit more animated, mouthing along to the chorus while an amused Bumzu tried not to look so amused.

"Well that's the last song," Bumzu said. "I'm going to head home and get some early sleep for once. You guys gonna be OK?"  
  
The both of them nodded. "Late supper then?" Minhyun asked. Baekho smiled.

"You know," Minhyun said later, around a mouthful of food, "It really felt as though you were singing only to me. You've improved while I was gone."

"Well someone has to pick up the slack while you're away. Not like we can make JR be the lead vocal."  
  
Minhyun laughed, "You're so mean!"

"You really did a good job in there. I mean, like, I almost cried. Especially when you sang that bit about 'b _ecause I was by your side, I've been happy till now._ I know it's about your dad, but it feels a lot like us, you know. The members. Having each other being enough."

 "I did sing it about you, though. Just now, I mean."

Minhyun was quiet. "So, maybe you're not as stupid as I thought."

Baekho shrugged. "What am I being stupid about, Minhyun. Tell me. You've never not been direct with me before."

"OK, I'm going to say something and you can tell me if you agree. I have feelings for you. And I think maybe, you feel something for me too," Minhyun said, almost whispering.

"The problem now, Baekho, is do we do something about that or do we just go on the way we've always done? Expect, and wait, for those feelings to fade. Like, maybe they're just boyhood crushes or something."

Baekho looked at him and said, "Did your feelings fade when you were away from us? From me?"

"No."

"Well, then they're real, I guess? It's not something I expected. I mean, we're both men and I thought we'd both be dating or having serious relationships by now."

"You're having a problem with this, us, maybe being gay."  
  
"I don't know what I am, or what you are, but what this is - we like each other. And it's not what I expected but maybe I can, live with it maybe?"  
  
Baekho had been looking down at the ground but when he looked up to see what Minhyun was thinking, he was met with a very amused expression.

"You think this is funny? This isn't easy for me."

"When are good things easy, stupid? You should know that by now." Minhyun took hold of Baekho's hand.   
  
"Now let's go back to your car, quickly."  
  
"Why? Are you in a hurry to get somewhere?"  
  
"Because I want to finally get to kiss that stupid mouth of yours. God knows I've waited long enough, you moron."


	3. Long Time Coming

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> "You honestly see yourself growing old with me?"  
> "I’ve put up with you for eight years. What’s a few decades more?”

"This is so cliche. Making out like teenagers in a car."  
"We haven't even done anything yet,” Baekho said as he manoeuvred the car out of the parking lot. “And don’t you try anything now, I need to focus on the road.”

Minhyun puckered up his lips and made loud kissing noises. “Oh no Baekho I can’t control myself whatever should I do?”

”If you’re trying to make me not want to kiss you ever, guess what? It’s working.”

Pouting, Minhyun settled back into the passenger seat, reclining it back as far as it could go.

”Where are we going?” 

Baekho glanced over at him and said,”Back to the dorm. I think it’s best we park the car at the usual spot and then you can decide if you want to stay over or have me drive you back.”

”Duh. Of course I’m staying over.”

The rest of the ride was silent, neither saying a word. It was a mix of nerves and heady anticipation, palpable even in the quiet. 

If Baekho’s hands were trembling a little as he finally parked the car, neither of them made mention of it.

They were now in a designated covered parking spot not too far from the dorms to walk but not too close the members could see them.

”So.” said Baekho. 

“So.” Minhyun answered back, his tone flippant, perhaps a little too much so.

”Well, we both know you’ve got zero experience actually kissing someone like a normal human being,” Baekho said, only for Minhyun to get all indignant.

”Oh, wow, like you’re the seasoned Casanova, you st—“ and that was Baekho’s cue to shut Minhyun up properly.

He’d grabbed Minhyun’s face with both hands, and though his grip was firm, he was careful enough to not slam their mouths together. Part of him still wanted to head bump Minhyun the way he did when the other man was being more insufferable than usual, but the other part, that other part wanted to feel something else.

It was easy enough to cover Minhyun’s half-open mouth with his own, easier to pull him closer and move the fingers of his right hand to the back of his best friend’s head, but the hard part? The hard part was figuring out just when to let go because now he had started, he didn’t know just how to stop.

The kissing had started out slow, Baekho slowly letting Minhyun adjust to the feel of their mouths joining, learning to reciprocate and once both of them got the hang of it, the kisses came faster and harder.

Minhyun was grasping at Baekho’s shoulders, scrabbling at them as though they were a lifeline and Baekho, Baekho was taking quick, grasping breaths in the tiniest of gaps between their kisses. Breathing not for the sake of breathing; breathing just to keep kissing, and kissing, and kissing.

Finally, Minhyun pulled away, taking a large, heaving breath before resting his forehead against Baekho’s.

”This,” He waved his hand in a sweeping motion, indicating the interior of the car, “This is too small and we both have too many clothes on.”  
  
Baekho laughed. “Much as I share your sentiment, I don’t think I’m ready for sex quite yet.”  
  
His answer was a smack on the head. “Baekho-yah your one-track mind! Making out and making love are different things. If you’re going to be such a prude then, fine, you can keep your boxers on.”

Laughing, Baekho pecked Minhyun quickly on the lips, smirking when he saw Minhyun’s lips follow when he pulled away. “Fine, we just feel each other up tonight. Anything more can wait until we, I don’t know, do more...research?”

And that was when Hwang Minhyun, all of 22 years old, totally lost it. Was it the adrenalin coming down after the highs of the last few minutes? Was it just the absurdity of the situation they were in? Who knew really, but it took all off five minutes before he stopped laughing, all while Baekho watched and worried, unsure of whether he should call JR and tell him Minhyun was having a makeout-triggered mental breakdown.

“You’re an idiot. But I’d rather you be my idiot. I'm already yours." His gaze fond, Minhyun reached over and kissed his best friend, lover and favourite idiot on the forehead.

”OK, we established we’re both idiots. How do we tell the other idiots about this, us?”

Minhyun thought on it for a bit and said,”I don’t think we should go right out and tell them. That’s so awkward, man. Let’s just go up, hang out for a bit, have a little small talk then when one of us goes to bed, the other will just casually say, OK be there in a bit. 

“And then, kiss!”

Baekho was now absolutely certain Minhyun had gone barking mad. 

“We could just, you know tell them, hey guys, guess what, Minhyun and I are now, sort of, well, a couple. Thought you should know.”

”That is absolutely no fun,” said Minhyun, pouting. “Come on Baekho-yah, give me this one thing!”

“I’ve already given you plenty of things, Minhyun-ah, and apparently fulfilling your surely insatiable sexual needs will also be on my to-give list.” 

That earned him another smack on the head. Baekho quietly wondered if he was now resigning himself to a future of being a battered boyfriend.

***

Minhyun had won that argument, and now the both of them were sitting in the Nu’est dorm living room listening to Ren apologise for 1. Completely turning Minhyun’s room into a Lady Gaga shrine and 2. Refusing to give the room back

”You can room with Jonghyun for tonight,” Ren suggested.

Minhyun shook his head. “Nah, I’m rooming with Baekho.” He turned to his about-to-not-be-secret-boyfriend and Baekho, blushing, nodded.

”So, I’m going to go to bed first and..” This time it was Minhyun’s turn to interrupt their conversation with a kiss, though this was more of the loud, smacking and most definitely embarrassing variety.

Still blushing, Baekho stammered something intelligible before quickly running to his room.

Leaving behind a very, very smug Minhyun.

Ren shrugged. “Well, took you two long enough. You bickered like an old, married couple enough that this isn’t a surprise.”

Aron was probably the most shocked of them all, as he stammered, “Whoa, since, whoa, what happened there? You guys are...”  
  
”Yes, we’re together. We only just started so, no, we weren’t hiding anything. Come on, it’s not like Baekho could keep this a secret from you guys anyhow.”

JR sighed. “Well, yah, he is the worst actor among us. Just do me a favour, OK? No funny business in the living room.” His ears turned slightly pink, despite his attempt at nonchalance. “And, well, since both of you can’t possibly fit in Baekho’s bed let’s all help move Ren’s old bed into his room.”

There was nothing else to discuss after that. Unspoken as it was, the understanding was still there - that even with the change of dynamics, Nu’est was still Nu’est. Family. Even if was no longer five brothers but three dorks and an old married couple.

Once all the good night, sleep tights and “Don’t make too much noise, think of my weak heart! (Aron)” were done with, it was just the two of them again.

Two twin beds shoved together against a wall, with two people cuddled up in the centre of them.

”Old married couple, that’s what Ren called us,” Minhyun said, as his fingers ran lightly through Baekho’s freshly washed, mostly air-dried hair. They were both shirtless, Minhyun in pyjama pants and Baekho in a roomy pair of boxers. 

“That’s not a bad thing to aspire to, I guess?” Baekho was nestled in the crook of Minhyun’s arm, with his own hand lazily resting on the other man’s waist.

Minhyun laughed. “You honestly see yourself growing old with me?” But his gaze softened, belying his amused tone.

”I’ve put up with you for eight years,” Baekho said, kissing the spot where Minhyun’s neck met his shoulder. “What’s a few decades more?”

Minhyun’s only answer was a kiss. 

 

 


End file.
